empathy

Health Advocacy Ethics – Conflict of Interest? Or Important Service?

A recent conversation with a handful of knowledgeable people, people I respect a great deal, yielded two different outcomes – either a loud “yes, of course!!” or a loud “no, no way!” So I want to know what YOU think. As a prelude to the story – the question I will ask you at the end is: Should Gwen become Mrs. Smith’s healthcare proxy? Can she ETHICALLY make that shift? (We are not asking a legal question here ? only a question of ethics.) Mrs. Smith is 90 years old and until recently was quite healthy. She is alone; her …

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Turning Adversity into Proactive Survivorship

It’s been a tough week. From the initial blow, I’ve been a poster child for Kubler Ross’s five stages of grief. At this point I’m probably mid-way between depression and acceptance. If you are a subscriber to my patient empowerment newsletter (not our APHA Monday Mail, rather, my Every Patient’s Advocate one) – then you have already heard my news – I sent out a heads up last Thursday just before my About.com newsletter went out. (If you aren’t a subscriber, why not? 😉 Here’s a link. ) The news is that after almost 7 years and 2000+ articles, out …

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RIP Ramona – With Appreciation for The Lessons She Taught Us

Ramona – whose real name was Rosemary – has died. She did it (mostly) her way. I first shared Ramona/Rosemary’s story with you a few months ago. She had contacted me through my patient empowerment work asking me to help her die. After a heinous surgical medical error many years ago, she could no longer be treated to provide (by her own definition) any quality to her life. So she wanted to put an end to her misery. Her primary care doctor, fearful he would be arrested, refused to help her. After thinking about it long and hard, I decided …

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Death, Dying, Unhappiness and Misery Have Been on My Mind

Several weeks ago I was contacted by Ramona*, a woman in her 50s who is leading what she considers to be a horrible, no-quality life. She is tied to machines for all but about 2 hours a day, she needs regular surgeries to stay alive, she can’t eat food (liquids only), there is no prospect for improvement, and she has no family… She has no hope, and she wants to die. She has tried discussing options with her doctors, but to no avail. She wants to stop her treatment, enter hospice care and receive palliative care instead. That should be …

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What Patients Fear – The Waiter Will Spit in Their Soup

In the patient empowerment corner of my world, a complaint or fear I hear voiced by patients is the fear of retaliation. They are afraid that if they speak up to their doctors, or ask questions, or make their own decisions, then they will get substandard care. The provider will be so upset, he or she won’t provide what the patient really needs. I call this The Waiter Will Spit In My Soup Syndrome. I’ve never had a conversation with someone who can identify a time this actually happened to them – where they got care that wasn’t up to …

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A Surefire Way to Drive Older Clients Away

OK – so I confess. I talk baby talk to my dog. He’s little, and snuggly, and adorable – and it’s just so easy to call him cutesy names and fall into that simplification of short sentences that we do with babies, too. Just what is it about babies and puppy dogs that begs us to speak baby talk to them. I think that it’s that aura of vulnerability that surrounds them. Vulnerability that begs us to be reassuring or coddling or just drippy-sweet. They clearly need caretaking or caregiving, and we, as their protectors, want to make them feel …

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Profession – or Calling? What Do You Consider Your Advocacy Work?

image - thinking

The month of March 2013 brought me more opportunities than I remember in a long time to think about the reasons I do the work I do – why I have chosen my profession, what I hope to get out of it, and what drives me to want to build its success – and your success, too. Why now? Well, frankly, even though I am not Catholic, it started with the election of a new pope. Throughout the discussions leading up to the Conclave, then the election of Pope Francis, much of the emphasis was on the passion the job …

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